David said to the Philistine, “You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty”

2 Samuel 17:45

Controlling personality type people surely can prove difficult to deal with. Goliath, stood way taller than most men. As a bully, he refused to back down and exuded a misplaced confidence in himself.  

Though Goliath may be the obvious offender in this story, a couple of others emerge as well. David’s own older brother, Eliab, tried to intimidate him. He questioned David’s presence, accused him of irresponsibility, and called him names. I have a feeling Eliab found himself embarrassed by his little brother’s presence and at his own lack of courage to confront Goliath. Eliab wished David would leave, but David, under God’s direction, did not.

Saul appears next as a controller. Saul, the king, needed credit for a victory over Goliath. He did his best to talk David out of going out to the giant, but if he did go wanted him to wear heavy armor. David resolutely reminded Saul of how the Lord had defended him in the past and would continue to do so. He also had the good sense to stick with the familiar weapons with which he already had experienced success. Adhering to God’s guidance, he defeated Goliath.

What can we learn from David about dealing with controlling people? 

Sometimes we have to walk away as he did with his brother. Other times we stay and listen, but allow God’s powerful presence in our lives to influence our actions as in the case of Saul. 

There are also times we have to stand our ground which may lead to a confrontation. As we deal with our own Goliath, we use the words the Holy Spirit puts in our hearts and allow our actions to follow.

God, your name is powerful. You are the ultimate authority in our lives. Help us not to let those with controlling personalities intimidate us. Help us to come before them in your name. 

Susan Partida